"At the top of the mountain we are all Snow Leopards." - - - Hunter S. Thomson
I do not have the internet anywhere in my house. I find I have no time to make the kind of money that it would cost me, especially since it is only a five minute walk from my place of residence to the public library. So when I need to connect with the outside world I just take a walk over here and sign up for some free internet time, courtesy of Salt Lake County. Of course there is usually a waiting list of 15 minutes or so before I can squeeze myself in between the children playing games like "Duck Hunt", or even "Bush Shoot Out". I'm not making that one up, my friends. Some child right next to me is on a computer right now, stalking through the White House in first person perspective, as Condoleeza Rice, shooting at God knows what. These are dark times. But never mind, I'm not here to talk about the state of children's computer games.
While I am waiting for a computer to become available I have developed this habit of reading a book, something that is rarely done in libraries these days. So, for the past six months, or so, I have been reading Kingdom of Fear: Loathsome Secrets of a Star-Crossed Child In the Final Days of the American Century, by my good, old friend Hunter S. Thomson. I read it in 15 minute segments. After six months of this I am on page 134. It will be a while before I finish that book. But I have found that this is the perfect way to read one of those books that you just never seem to get around to. You read a few pages here and there, then simply put a bookmark on your page and come back in a few days. That book will still be there, just waiting for someone to pick it up and read more of those terrible words.
Hunter's books work particularly well in these conditions. It allows his craziness to burn slowly into your soul, and then, before you know what has happened to you, you find yourself yelling things like, "God's mercy on you swine!" at innocent police officers on the side of the road. Or you go to work and end up saying terrible things to your boss like, "You people voted for Hubert Humphrey, and you killed Jesus!" You will start calling people "Dirty animals", and threatening to put them out of their terrible misery for crimes against decency, and freedom. I don't really have time to explain all this madness, or how it has helped me to see things the way they really are.
It is a terrible condition, and I recommend you stay far away from the sort of swill that I'm talking about. It will do you absolutely no good to see things in this way. Nevertheless, I do it all the time. Do as I say, not as I do, and all that stuff. Because after all, I am crazy.
- Mahalo
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5 comments:
You are one crazy bastard :)
I do this in bookstores!
What a great idea. Yeah, Thompson's a little nutty. But I think I'm going to use this technique with an 800+ page biography I've been trying to read for a year. I'm on page 150 or so.
Since I wrote this it seems they are on to me. Maybe I'm just paranoid, but my very tiny book marks keeps disappearing now. They're on to me.
Yup, they are. They found you out.
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